Thursday, April 7, 2011

My strength is my weakness?

I have a big heart. My heart is my strength and weakness. Funny how both are true. It is my strength because I can easily look past people's faults. For example most people would think of a sexual offender as the worst kind of person out there. I think of them and I think, what horrible things happened to them in their lives that they committed such a terrible act. Right there; a barrier is broken, a story is heard, and healing can happen. If I thought of their act as evil and accused them as having to pay for that burning in hell, they would not share their story with me and the cycle continues.

It is also my weakness, in that I get taken advantage of easily and struggle dealing out consequences for actions that deserve them.

Many people may ask (and have), how can you have sympathy for someone that hurts a child, for someone that abuses animals, or that has sexually offended someone? Well, there are multiple reasons. One, as a follower of Christ, I am called to love (Matthew 22:37-39). I take this seriously. Second, my life experience has broken me and if I only focused on all the bad things that happened to me as a child, I would be ineffective and depressed. Instead, I have to use these experiences and not only sympathize with the victims, but also the offenders. Three, I work with kids who have done some pretty evil things to other people, kids, and/or animals but when you read their case history, see their scars, and hear their stories you can't help but think... no wonder they did what they did. In fact, it is usually pretty mild compared to what happened to them.

I think also, I am a protector. Today, I was asked "if you could choose how you would die, how would it be?" I want to die protecting someone or standing up for someone. Defending those that can not defend themselves. I hope my life reflects my desired death. I hope everyday I live, protecting those that can't protect themselves, standing up for the underdog, and loving everyone especially those that "don't deserve it."

My favorite verse is Psalm 91:4
He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

This verse pretty much summarizes me (besides being a protector I have an obsession with feathers).

Go on, and love.

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